About Us

We are not alone.

There are others walking amongst us. Other washing and bathing brands. But none of them want you for your body in quite the same way as we want you for your body. Because we only want you for your bodyisn't just our advertising strap line, it's or whole reason for being.

Every last molecule of your earthly being is ours to pamper, cleanse and leave fragrant, until your physical outer shell is no more and your soul is transported to a planet far far away in the galaxy of gorgeousness, to be a reborn as a twinkly star barely visible from the roll top baths and outdoor beach showers you'll eventually be hundreds of light years away from.

Contact Us

That's not just a rubber duck in your bath, that's not just a sponge in your shower, that's not just a loofah in your hand. All of these and other washing accoutrements are methods of communication to enable you to get in touch with us. Simply pick up that flannel or toe nail brush and speak into it. We'll get back in less time that it takes to reach Mars, so expect to hear from us in about 7 months.

NB- For thise requiring a faster response to their questions, please call +44(0) 207 488 1712 or email info at etc.

Stockists and Buying

Alas, you can't buy our products on line from this site. The postage is just too expensive from out warehouse facility just north of Pluto.

However, scroll down for a complete list of all our stockists a lot closer to home.

If you have a bulk order in mind, please get in touch direct.

The odd discount isn't alien to us.

  • ASOS
  • Harvey Nichols
  • H&M Sweden and Norway
  • Le Bon Marche France
  • Monarch Airlines
  • Ocado
  • Printemps France
  • Selfridges
  • Superdrug
  • Urban Outfitters
  • Ulta USA
  • Big W Australia
  • Priceline Australia
  • And more independent stores/pharmacies and online retailers than there are black holes in the universe


Universally used by those with 8 legs, 6 arms, 5 eyes, 2 belly buttons, 26 toes, 18 and a half fingers, 14 ears, 4 noses, 3 penises and god knows how many internal organs, plus, of course, used by more down to earth humans (with a pedestrian 2 or 1 of everything), these are our products. We hope you like buying and trying them. And if not, "cacacacacacacacaca". That's an alien term of abuse we picked up on our travels.

ANATOMICALS About us - For a change, why can't somebody want me for my brains?ANATOMICALS Contact Us - These interplanetary roaming charges are outrageous ANATOMICALS Stockists - They're out of hand wash again! ANATOMICALS Stockists - They're out of hand wash again! ANATOMICALS Products - Why'd you stop doing that depilatory cream?
ANATOMICALS Products - Why'd you stop doing that depilatory cream?
Coffee Body Cleanser
Every Man/Woman Body Cleanser
Floral Body Cleanser
Mango Body Cleanser
Oriental Body Cleanser
Bath Bar
Fruity Bath Gel
Junior Apple
Junior Banana
Body Scrub
Coffee Bean Salt Scrub
Strawberry Salt Scrub
Coconut And Mango Body Lotion
Neroli Body Lotion
Bergamot And Green Ginger Body Butter
Coconut Body Butter
Frequent Wash Shampoo
Head Shock Shampoo
Peach Conditioning Shampoo
Sleek Conditioner
Avocado And Wheatgerm Hair Mask
Coconut And Honey Hair Mask
Grapefruit And Mandarin Hand Soap
Norfolk Lavender Hand Soap
Watermelon And Cucumber Hand Soap
Peppermint And Lemon Hand Soap
Hand Sanitiser
Hand Wipes Dual Pack
Daily Hand Cream
Night Time Hand Cream
Daily Face Wash
Glycolic Cleansing Pads
Spf 15 Daily Moisturiser
Facial Spritz
Day And Night Spot Zap
Deep Cleansing Mud Mask
Anti-Blemish Face Mask
Anti-Stress Face Mask
Hydrating Face Mask
Mattifying Face Mask
Face Scrub
Face Mask Envelope
Skincare Envelope
Purifying Cloth Face Mask
Hydrating Cloth Face Mask
Firming Cloth Face Mask
Cloth Face Mask Envelope
Eye Gel
Gel Eye Mask
Wake Up Under Eye Patches
Regular Lip Balm
Spf 8 Cherry Lip Balm
Dry Relief Balm
Headache Balm
Sleep Balm
Joint And Muscle Rub
Nod Off Sleep Mask
Cruisin Sleep Mask
Sleep Kit
Breath Mints
Jet Set Kit
Globetrot Kit
Marine Bathing Kit
Morning After Kit
Skincare Kit
The 'We Only Want You For Your Body' Box
Porn Star/Body Builder Tote Bag
Model/Punky Girl Tote Bag
Hairy Man/Goth Girl Tote Bag
Skater Girl/Rent Boy Tote Bag
Dwarf/Fly Guy Tote Bag.